Torn.

My desires for what I ultimately want Bientôt l’été to be are being torn between two extremes. On the one hand there is my love and admiration for Marguerite Duras, whose life, writing and films the immense beauty of which I cannot but want to pay tribute to. On the other hand there’s the medium that I work in and what I know of its audience.

This is not a choice between high art and low art. It is a choice been different kinds of pleasures.

I deeply enjoy the confusing, cerebral, ambiguous but also charmingly naive and seductively romantic work of Duras. And part if this joy comes from knowing that not many people share it. Not that Duras doesn’t have a big readership -she is one of the most famous French contemporary writers. But the pleasure feels so personal that it cannot really be shared.

Videogames offer another type of pleasure. Far less cerebral, but certainly not less emotional. I have always thought of interactive media as a way to connect to people much more directly. On an almost subconscious level, beyond the limitations of language, and even culture to some extent. Perhaps videogames are the medium must closely related to music. They certainly share some of its properties.

But how can I bring these two tastes together? Can they even co-exist? And should I even bother with Duras, given that my love for her work is so personal and that there is hardly any overlap with games culture. I guess in the end, I have no other guide than my inadequate heart. And I am cursed to make a(nother?) torn piece.